Tuesday, November 29, 2005
I've know this a long time ago but this isn' the first time that the prediction I made came true... It will always haunt me until I find a way to open the gate inside of myself... the mysterious past that haunt the living flesh of my body. The lone wolf that remains in my body.
Who or what the hell am I feeling? Has it been wreaking havoc inside, turning me from a friendly guy to a lone wolf? Yes, you may see a happy and cheerful being in me but there is the sides you don't even see... why bother? They judge anything by its cover, not even thinking on the rights of this unlikely person... who are they to judge thy self? Who are they to tell thee on what are thee? They are the bloody hunters of the red moon, the bloody moon that wreaks havoc every war that pass, every battle sought, ever death that spills innocent lives...
I'll search for the answers until the day I find it...
Sunday, November 27, 2005
Our Lady of Peace
Somewhere out there
Last time I talked to you,
you were lonely and out of place.
You were looking down on me,
lost out in space.
Laid underneath the stars,
strung out and feeling brave.
Watch the red orange glow,
watch them float away.
Down here in the atmosphere,
garbage and city lights,
you gotta save your tired soul,
you gotta save our lives.
Turn on the radio,
to find you on sattellite,
I'm waiting for the sky to fall,
I'm waiting for a sign.
All we are is all so far.
You're falling back to me,
the star that I can't see.
I know you're out there,
somewhere out there.
You're falling out of reach,
defying gravity,
I know you're out there,
somewhere out there.
Hope you remember me,
when you're homesick and need a change.
I miss your purple hair,
I miss the way you taste.
I know you'll come back someday,
on a bed of nails I'll wait.
I'm praying that you don't burn out,
or fade away.
All we are is all so far
You're falling back to me,
the star that I can't see.
I know you're out there,
somewhere out there.
You're falling out of reach,
defying gravity,
I know you're out there,
somewhere out there.
You're falling back to me,
the star that I can't see.
I know you're out there, oh.
You're falling out of reach,
defying gravity....
I know you're out there,
somewhere out there.
You're falling back to me,
the star that I can't see.
I know you're out there,
somewhere out there.
You're falling out of reach,
defying gravity,
I know you're out there,
somewhere out there.
You're falling back to me.
Well I know,
I know.
You're falling out of reach.
I know...
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Something is bothering me, why do I exist? why do I feel envy for my sister? and why did my parents didn't care for me until I walked? But I know that there are questions not to be answered and doors that is not meant to be open...
The answers lie in our precious little heart, If we think about it, we will just have to die... If I was just in control of my heart, I would just make it stop to feel nothing, just numbness...
A friend once told me that if he was just the wind, he'd be just with me... I wish I was like that too... the pain and agony that my sister feels is nothing compared to what I feel every minute, every second...
the loneliness
the humiliation that I feel everytime I see that person that made my heart as cold as ice and hard as steel...
Monday, November 14, 2005
=-=Romeo and Juliet=-=
11/11/2005, we held our book representation or in other language...a play...
I played as Mercutio but hey I've got a double role. I played as Mercutio and a music director, our lord capulet just backed out a few hours before the play, I really liked to play as Mercutio because of it's really just me. Its an old english style, I got to die from a fight. I was really nervous, I messed up in a few lines and the fight scene between me and Tybalt. Heh, we BOTH MESSED UP... being the musical director was really hard because I was supposedly provide the music and put it into life, I mean action... ermm... the scene!!! I used only old music, namely orchestral. It was really successful but the critism and result will come out tommorow, at 11/14/2005, Monday at 10:30 AM to 11:30 AM. MY apologies to anyone who I got to go in a fight and got hurt in the practices of the fight scene... I sweated my way through it.
Monday, November 07, 2005
I guess this is a new chapter but I won't post something about APC... I maybe going a story right now, it's either my life or my life with a touch of fantasy... I really love to escape this darn world where darkness rules and dark goes over with light, I want to change htat, I want to change everything that will happen to me...ermmm.....you'll figure out when I'll be seen with your naked eyes... see the truth about me but never believe in everything you see, it maybe the real deal or it maybe just the cover your scratching... withing my life and the light is the death and darkness...
Wednesday, November 02, 2005
I know that this is a time for going to our departed love ones but I need to say that I love my new family... in our house, we fight and have misunderstandings. I mean, they don't really know what's inside of my emotions, they judge from the physical being that goes... They see that I'm okay but I'm NOT OKAY!!! But I now enjoy the hands that been lend to me by my clan...they aren't only like friends but family... I will do anything just to be with them... I am not dillutional but I'm not a presimistic person either but I'm the opstimistic person that almost everyone hates... due to my blank expression in my face, my large voice that makes them look that I'm insulting them, I'm the misunderstood and the unseen fire that burns inside the shadows of darkness...
